Lost

I've officially think Ima lose it. Honestly, I think Satin is trying to weaken me in the knees so I can fall & he can get his pleasure out of it. My relationships with everyone has crumbled. Maybe to a point where its just fake smiles & hi's & bye's & occasional "i miss yous." Varsity practices have been a struggle because I can't get certain things right. Beach trips been pulling me away from going out with the othaas. Debut practices leave excluded from all the binding times my friends have. Seriously, I don't have time to even see my damn sister ! & She's blood. =/ It's supposed to be family first but I haven't even spoken to her. Maybe for a week now. I'm seriously weakening at the knees. Every little thing is getting to me when it shouldn't. I'm not the person to say I get easily annoyed. But lately, I am. If your ever around me, & I'm being a bitch. I really don't mean it. I don't know whats coming over me. Maybe I over think things? Idk. I haven't hung out with Mommmiee Trina && Dadddieee Charles. & They always had me at my weakest points. There was never a time where one wasn't there to wipe away tears. My own "BESTEST" can't tell me shit no more. That's how bad our friendship is. My Biggie Me <3 We haven't spoken in awhile either. & She's supposed to be my role model. Even my relationship with "The Boys" I haven't spent much time with the Kevins. Or Bryan =/ & those are my brothers/boys <3 & Mighty/Ramon.... I don't even wanna talk about it. But all I can say is that I PROMISED ID NEVER LEAVE OR FORGET YOU. thass my wordddd. Before the summer ends I hope all relationships are rekindled. Because like this ima go INSANE.

I miss the GOOD times